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7 things you should not do when you are jealous

Few behaviors can be as unhealthy as jealousy, which causes a serious relationship problem and can end a relationship. Although couple relationships are complicated in themselves, they are even more so when there is no trust between the two members.

Jealousy is harmful and can degrade relationships until causing the rupture in addition to a great discomfort. That discomfort not only affects the person who is the victim of jealousy, but also the person who is jealous.

  • Related article: "The types of jealousy and their different characteristics

What not to do when you are jealous

Jealousy can be seen as feelings of insecurity and anguish that hijack the jealous person's attention. To a certain extent they are normal, because nobody likes to lose someone they love.

However, when the person is unable to control these feelings and jealousy causes so much suffering that it endangers a love relationship, we are talking about unhealthy jealousy, of which we explain more in the article "Unhealthy Jealousy: 10 Common Signs of Extremely Jealous People

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The first step in overcoming jealousy is being aware of it. Therefore, if you are jealous in the following lines we have wanted to highlight some actions that you should not carry out when you are jealous.

1. Do not think bad of everything

They say that the jealous man does not think badly because of what he sees but because of what he imagines. When a person feels insecure, they may relate things that are not really connected, or suspect something without even checking the veracity of their beliefs. Therefore, it is necessary that you detect when you lose your nerves and see if the reason why you lose them is real or is the result of your imagination.

2. Do not accuse him

When a person is jealous, the first reaction is anger, and although there is no firm evidence to confirm the reason for your jealousy, when entering an unhealthy dynamic, the jealous person may accuse another person unjustly. Therefore, it is necessary to be realistic, and before letting these toxic feelings invade you, you must be as objective as possible.

3. Do not forbid

Overly jealous people adopt controlling behaviors over their partner: telling him how to dress, who to go with, etc. No one is going to be with you out of obligation, so this behavior will only cause the love relationship to become toxic.

  • Related article: "23 signs you have a ‘toxic relationship’ with a partner

4. Don't become a detective

Insecurity leads a person to become obsessed with being in control of the partner, but also wanting to know what the partner does at all times. For example, an individual with jealousy may want to know what her partner is doing through their social networks. There are people who even make use of the partner account without their behavior. This behavior is not healthy, and besides hurting the victim of jealousy, it also hurts the jealous one.

5. Do not speak without thinking

Impulsiveness can appear at any time when the jealous person is unable to control her own emotions.

6. Do not call at all hours

This impulsivity problem also causes the jealous person to want to know what the partner is doing at all times. And in fact, in most cases, this he's already on the defensive even before he speaks, so his attitude can be very aggressive. It is not good to be aware of the couple 24 hours a day.

7. Don't put your life aside

The previous point is an example of how a relationship in which distrust and jealousy predominate, obsession makes an appearance. This occurs because jealousy appear due to low self-esteem and insecurity, and the jealous man is afraid of feeling abandoned. To overcome jealousy, the best alternative is to work on yourself.

How to stop being a jealous person

Considering the above points, how is it possible to stop being a jealous person?

1. Acknowledge that you are jealous

The above points are examples of what a jealous person does, therefore, detecting them is the beginning to get out of this complex situation. Do you behave as in the previous points? Then it is necessary that you look for a solution, even with professional help if necessary.

2. Put it on your side

Jealousy is somewhat normal feelings. But some people, despite feeling this way, do their part so that the situation does not get out of hand. This is key to avoid entering a vicious circle that harms the two actors in the love relationship. If you want to change, the only one who can do it is you.

3. Be objective

Sometimes the emotions we feel cloud us, but we must be emotionally intelligent and be objective about how we behave in certain situations with the partner.

4. Work on you

As I have already said, jealousy is often a consequence of low self-esteem and insecurity. For this reason, it is necessary that, in the interest of leaving jealousy behind, people with this problem should work on their own personal development. When someone is happy with the life that she has, not looking for someone to fill this void, but someone who adds.

5. Improve communication

Improving communication with your partner is the best way to overcome jealousy, as this avoids many conflicts and leads to no misinterpretations. Communicating correctly with the couple can increase trust between the two, because in this way each knows the needs of the other and it is possible to negotiate for the good of both.

  • If you want to know more about these strategies to stop feeling jealous, you can read this article: "How to stop being a jealous person? 12 ways to do it
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