How to open up more with other people: 6 tips for socializing

The human being is gregarious in nature, and regardless of our personality characteristics we need contact with others in order to achieve adequate social development, which allows us to learn from others and get to know ourselves better themselves.

In this article let's see how to open up more with other people, so that we can overcome shyness or excessive zeal for privacy that often prevents us from making contact with others. We will also see some of the reasons why we could have problems socializing.

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Why is it hard for me to open up to other people?

To see how to open up more with other people, it is necessary to understand that this psychological limitation to time to interact with others can be due to a variety of personal factors or social.

For example, there are subjects who are introverted in nature who find it much more difficult than others to start friendships or have spontaneous social contact, since they feel less interest in the intellectual stimuli external to their body. These introverts differ radically from those who are able to interact with any stranger at the public transportation stop, or while waiting their turn to pay in line at the Supermarket.

The ideal is to have a proper balance between introversion and extroversion, conflicts to relate to other people occur many times when the subject is at one of the extremes of these two slopes.

For example, a subject who is too introverted will have problems with relationships because he does not feel comfortable during social protocols, while those who are too extroverted will have conflicts to socialize due to their exacerbated behavior in search of stimuli external.

Some parenting styles may also negatively influence the way you open up to others. Those subjects who were raised in an overly protective style may have difficulties in terms of self-confidence and self-esteem, which makes relationships difficult interpersonal.

On the other hand, those who were raised in a completely permissive environment will present social difficulties based on ignorance of the limits; They are subjects who generally believe that everything is allowed to them and do not easily understand when to give up or decrease the intensity of contact.

How to be more socially open?

The irrational fear of relating to others is motivated by social anxiety, which arises when the subject assumes that any contact that is generated between him and other people will end badly in some way shape. Namely, the person anticipates her social failure and this predisposes him to make mistakes.

To reduce this pattern of thought, it is necessary to do an exercise in logic where we answer key questions to ourselves. Why am I afraid of contact with others? Does it make sense to be afraid of strangers? Why do I think things will always go wrong?

By answering these questions you will realize that in most cases there is really nothing serious to fear about social relationships, and you will take a predisposition to leave limiting thoughts behind that generate the feeling of social anxiety.

However, to learn to open up more with other people, you have to go from words to actions, and this is not easy: it requires practice, and not just questioning certain beliefs. That is to say that as long as you limit yourself to reflecting, you will not make significant progress where it matters, which is the context of real-time interaction with people who speak with you.

In the next few lines we are going to examine a list with practical tips so that you can improve your way of opening up to social relationships.

1. Accept difficulty on contact

The first step should always be accept that we have a difficulty in social relationships. Regardless of the causes, it is important that we do not evade this fact and are willing to recognize where we can improve.

There are unconscious defense mechanisms that make it difficult for us to recognize our own limitations, and make us look the other way. For example, when we shift blame to other people or circumstances, we are distancing ourselves from the real issue.

2. Relaxation techniques to decrease social anxiety

There are several simple exercises that can help you lower your general anxiety levels, and they are useful before and during certain intense social interactions. For example, controlled diaphragmatic breathing exercises can help, as well as certain Mindfulness exercises that will only take a few minutes. What's more, some of them are so simple that you can put them into practice without it being noticed, although the ideal is that you do them having a quiet space that offers you privacy.

3. Create bonds of trust

Trust is essential for a friendship relationship to transcend. That is why we must try to make people feel confident with us. We will not achieve this in a forced or hasty manner.; The ideal is to let the relationship gradually acquire these dyes.

Some methods to build trust with others can be; tell them some personal anecdotes about us, expose their own vulnerabilities and ask for the opinion of others about a significant topic for them.

4. Improve your self esteem

To achieve quality relationships and have the necessary strength to open ourselves to other people, it is necessary to first work in our garden (ourselves). We must be able to see the value we have as people and understand that we are on an equal footing with others when we interact.

A good way to do this is to do a personal affirmation exercise; we stand in front of a mirror and tell the person in front of us various reasons why it should be valued. For example, "you are noble because you like to help other people", and so on.

• You may be interested: "Low selfsteem? When you become your worst enemy"

5. Avoid prejudice

Prejudices are generalized thinking styles in which there is an all or nothing situation, of categorical thinking, when it comes to valuing others. These kinds of experiences only plunge us further into anxiety and hopelessness to properly relate to others, because it leads us to feel like we don't fit in.

It is important to bear in mind that not all people are the same, despite the fact that we all have different tastes in certain aspects.

6. Not change your essence

To please, many people go to the point of abandoning their principles or their tastes only to be accepted in groups. However, this is counterproductive, because there is no point in losing yourself in the process of pleasing others.

Remember that principles are not negotiated, you must always be you and make others see that you are capable of respect their opinions even if you disagree with them, as long as they do the same to you.