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The psychology of attraction, in 12 keys

What does science say about attraction? What are the results of the research carried out by psychologists regarding this phenomenon?

In this article you will find the 12 keys to the psychology of attraction and the mysteries that surround the relationship between Our brain and our behavior related to the act of attracting.

Attraction Psychology and Research

Psychologists have been trying for years to find out more about attraction, for example, why and how this process occurs, why some people attract us and not others. Today it is thought that attraction involves cultural and biological variables, but attraction is an abstract concept and there has not always been a consensus on this issue. In fact, some research has provided some curious data. You can meet them in this article: "Love and infatuation: 7 surprising investigations".

On the other hand, it is known that the dynamics of affective-sexual attraction move through different logics, above all, taking into account two criteria. The first is the biological sex of the person, whether it is a man or a woman: what some find attractive does not have to be be it for the others, and vice versa, while within each of these groups we can detect common patterns. On the other hand, the level of attraction you feel for someone with the idea of looking for a sexual partner, than having the idea of ​​finding a sentimental partner with whom to live in a indefinite. Both situations pose different needs and goals.

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Keys to the psychology of attraction

Virtually all human beings can be attracted to someone, with the exception of asexual (or rather, part of them). When someone attracts us and makes us feel that special sensation, our world changes. That person becomes our target and whatever happens we want to merge into his body. Society may have evolved, but our innate instincts such as attraction instincts have not.

And... what does psychology say about it? What are the keys to attraction psychology? To find out, you just have to keep reading.

1. Handsome or ugly?

One of the big questions that many of us ask ourselves is whether physicality is so important when it comes to flirting, that is, being handsome. In fact, Surely everyone will agree that there are not very attractive people who are successful in love and attraction.

According to research published in the British newspaper "The Telegraph", the key to this is the attitude shown by some people. There are many individuals who, despite not being attractive, show great security and self-confidence. Maybe the beauty is not so important after all.

  • Recommended article: "Does the physique matter when it comes to flirting? 3 thoughts on beauty"

2. Best fun and intriguing

A person may be attractive and successful, and if they also have great self-confidence they are certainly captivating. But what if it's boring?

Maybe we don't like it that much anymore. This is what John Medina says, a biologist who concludes that the brain has a very short attention span. Because we are attracted to people and things that are fun, interesting, intriguing and that catch our attention. At the end of the day, attraction is not just a pretty face. But it is the moments we share with that person thataccentuate those intimate moments.

3. 30 seconds is enough

You may have heard the phrase many times that the first impression is what counts, and this could be true when it comes to attraction. Has happened to you have you ever felt a crush just see that special person.

Research states that it only takes 30 seconds to be attracted to a person. Appearance may matter then.

4. Red: attraction color

Colors provoke emotions in people, and red is associated with love, passion and fertility for many reasons. Now, it seems that red could be the color of attraction, according to a study.

These researchers conclude that red is the color that both men and women should dress in, because it makes us feel better and makes other people want us more. In other words, it increases our seductive power.

5. Symmetry

A study from the University of Mexico led by a biologist found that both men and women find more attractive people of the opposite sex who have a more symmetrical face and body.

This is because the brain associates symmetry with good genetics. Also, the study concluded that people with more symmetrical features enjoy a more pleasant intimate life.

6. Question of curves

Although the world of fashion or magazines strive to make us fans of slim people, the reality is that curves are still popular with men. Here's what a study by Devendra Singh, a psychologist and researcher at the University of Texas, found.

According to her conclusions, the figure of the woman that resembles an hourglass is the most attractive. In the case of women, they prefer men with broader shoulders.

7. Body language

Body language has been one of the most studied topics, and it has been concluded that open body language appeals to both men and women. This type of body language shows a willingness to court, which helps start conversations. Exposing the torso, raised shoulders, or showing the neck make you more attractive.

  • You can learn more about this in our article: "The 6 signs that show physical attraction to another person"

8. Facial structure

There seems to be a relationship between the facial structure and what happens in our body. Estrogen contributes to the growth of bones in the face of women, specifically the lower face or chin.

In men, testosterone is involved in the development of the lower face, jaw, or prominent forehead. These facial structures are attractive to the opposite sex.

9. The smell

A recent study has shown that women smell better and are more attractive to men at certain times of the month, which has to do with the menstrual cycle.

For these, the men who smell best are those with symmetrical features. Other research found that women during menstruation have a finer sense of smell and are more attracted to men with symmetrical features.

10. Voice peculiarities

The voice we emit can also be an aphrodisiac. Science has shown that men prefer women with a higher voice. While women prefer men with deep voices. This has to do with hormones and the reproductive development of the species.

11. The dilated pupils betray

The look is undoubtedly one of the keys to attraction. A deep look can touch our hearts. Science says that dilated pupils reveal our attraction to another person.

When they get bigger, it can indicate that the other person is attracted. This is what a University of Chicago research led by Dr. Eckhard Hess says.

12. Signs of attraction

But also: What signs do men and women show when we feel attraction? Science has come to the following conclusions.

A man interested in a woman usually:

  • Make eye contact more often

  • Smile more

  • You do more caring behaviors towards yourself. For example, putting on a tie

  • Sit upright

  • Put your shoulders back and chest out

A woman, on the other hand, performs these behaviors:

  • Smile and make eye contact more frequently, just like men

  • Make a slight inclination towards the person who attracts them

  • Exposes the hands, neck, and palms

  • Cross and uncross the legs

  • Take care of your skin more than usual

  • Touching hair

Bibliographic references:

  • Kanazawa, S. (2011). Intelligence and physical attractiveness. Intelligence, 39 (1): pp. 7 - 14.
  • Miller, R., Perlman, D., and Brehm, S.S. (2014). Intimate Relationships. McGrawHill Companies.
  • Vacharkulksemsuk, T. (2016). Dominant, open nonverbal displays are attractive at zero-acquaintance. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 113 (15): pp. 4009 - 4014.

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