The map is not the territory

What would you think if I told you that 80% of your conflicts never really existed! And as strange as this statement may seem, it is completely true. And the problem lies in the idea we have about the perception of reality.

We tend to assume that our senses show us reality as it is, without stopping to reflect. that the brain, as such, is a biocomputer locked in a cranial vault, which has never seen the reality. The only thing you can do is create a subjective reality, based on their interpretation of the information provided by the sense organs, which in the end are nothing more than bits of information, encoded in chemical or electrical codes.

As you can understand, what each one of us "Sees" is a map, a drawing or a simplified idea of ​​the complex territory.

• Related article: "What is Coaching and what is it for?"

Differences between the map and the territory

The map is not the same as the territory. Let's see the difference.

The territory is the external reality that surrounds you. It is what it is, independently. Therefore, it is objective.

Instead, the map is the mental representation of what you believe (and, consequently, you perceive) of the territory itself, the objective reality. It is your way of seeing things and experiencing them. As a result, the map always depends on subjectivity.

What does it depend on? Of the senses (smell, sight, hearing, touch and taste), of beliefs, of values ​​and principles, of memories, of cultural and social patterns. They are all your filters. Those filters differentiate you from other people. They are activated, consciously and unconsciously, every time you experience something, whatever the type of experience.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming focuses on the map and not the territory. Thus, it is important that you know your own map of the situation you want to work on. Because what you are going to do is work on your internal reality, the map.

From here you have two steps to follow:

• Know your own particular map: your way of seeing things.
• Understand that you respond to objective reality from your own map (and others too).

This knowledge will lead you to more empathic relationships, where we can create stronger psycho-affective bonds, which will improve each of our relationships, both interpersonal and intrapersonal.

• You may be interested in: "Emotional management: 10 keys to master your emotions"

The metamodel to modify the map

The meta model is an amazing resource for getting someone out of their resourceless map into the see-hear-feel reality that their world map refers to. At that point, they are in the perfect place to change the meanings they have assigned to those representations.

This opening opens up the possibility of changes that will return them to a more resourceful map.

The questions of the metamodel not only disassemble maps without resources and limiting beliefs, but they are also a specific tool for people to have more specificity about what they are talking about.

For example, when someone says, "No one cares about me," you may believe that what he is saying at the time is true. The metamodel questions will allow them to enlarge their map of the world, making them see that they may not be able to know what others in the world are feeling, and perhaps even make them see that someone cares about them.

• Related article: "Cognition: definition, main processes and functioning"

The metamodel lights the way

As a coach, friend, etc., the metamodel questions can also be used to help you better understand what another person means.

For example, when someone expresses, "He hurt me," your map of the world might lead you to think that the person was physically hurt. The other person may have been saying that her spouse did not compliment him on his new haircut. Big difference!

By using the metamodel questions, you can gain a much better understanding of other people's maps, while avoiding your assumptions conflicting with theirs.

The meta model can be used to achieve clarity and precision for both yourself and others, to make the results more specific and achievable, to destabilize limiting maps, beliefs and states, and to enrich ingenious states and further.

I wonder what specific changes will occur after what you've read now.