How to stop fighting with my partner constantly: 8 tips

Relationships are always complicated, because living with people with whom you share a lot always is. Emotional involvement, expectations of future plans and the fact of having to divide tasks are potential sources of conflict, to which we also have to add other sacrifices related to courtship and marriage.

This makes many people wonder... How can I stop fighting so much with my partner on a daily basis? In this article we will see several tips on how to manage coexistence between people in love, making arguments less frequent.

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How to stop fighting so much with my partner?

Follow these guidelines to better regulate communication and emotions in your relationship, adapting these ideas to your specific case.

1. control your expectations

You shouldn't assume that the goal is to never argue with your partner again, because that's unrealistic. The fact of adopting the expectation of maintaining an ideal relationship

in which everything is constantly smiles can be, in itself, a reason for conflict, something that predisposes us to get frustrated and angry at any detail and imperfection.

2. Do not keep anything important

The fact of avoiding conflict by hiding information is also something that can aggravate the problem, causing the chain of lies created to hide it. generate discomfort and eventually anger when unpleasant surprises appear.

3. Adopt constructive attitudes

There are those who confuse pointing out that the other has done something wrong with humiliating the other because he has done something wrong. The first is necessary so that this behavior is not repeated, but the second only serves to make the other person defensive, reaffirm yourself and believe that you have done nothing wrong.

It is a phenomenon that occurs through a process known as cognitive dissonance: if the other person shows a very bad image of us, one that deserves ridicule, then the other person is wrong and as a consequence is wrong to criticize our behavior.

4. Avoid mixing reproaches

It is important that, when we complain about something, we refer only to what we are criticizing at that moment, and not let's use that as an excuse to bring up the topic of a previous discussion in order to have more ammunition with which to attack the another person. the latter is not honest, does not serve to solve the problem and also favors the appearance of conflicts.

5. show affection

This is basic advice: since you love the other person, show it through everyday displays of affection. Otherwise, the only thing that will be evident is frustration and discontent in the moments in which it is discussed, but not love. Therefore, the relationship can become a battlefield.

Ultimately, it is important to be clear that love is not something to be taken for granted; must be expressed.

6. Talk a lot about what happens to you

Another piece of advice on how to stop arguing so much is based on the idea that many times these confrontations are caused by a lack of communication. This causes one of the members of the couple to remain ignorant regarding a subject that in case of knowing would consider important, and that when you hear about it, it makes you wonder why this lack of transparency is due: lack of trust? Inability to think about the other person? Disinterest in your point of view?

7. Put a limit to humor

Some people confuse humor with constantly ridiculing the other person. This not only does not make sense, but in practice it can become something that significantly damages the couple, and that in extreme and frequent cases It can be considered a type of psychological abuse, as is the case with the gaslighting.

It is one thing to laugh with a person, and another is to laugh at the person. Humor cannot be a shield with which to cover cruelty and attacks on the dignity of the other, because that generates frustration and anger, and what is more important, it harms the victim.

8. Talk about your priorities

Knowing the concerns and interests of the other person is fundamental to understanding what moves them to act. Being aware of the mental world of the other allows joint plans to be drawn up more easily and that a situation does not occur in which the needs of one are subjected to those of the other, with the consequent resentment and accumulated frustrations.