This is the question you should ask on the first date

The first impression you make on a first date is vital for that relationship to flourish, and that is precisely what makes them such an uncomfortable event. But in the same way that the image you give is important, it is also important that the other person interests you and you see a relationship with them as possible.

To find out if this is the right person, everyone focuses on asking about their tastes, hobbies or work, to see if there is a compatibility. But also There is a question you can ask to find out if this relationship has a future and that can reveal a lot about the other person.

• Related article: "45 questions to ask on the first date"

The best question you can ask on a first date

On the first date, you may not know very well what to talk about, or you may have a thousand questions you want to ask to find out more about who you are in front of. It is normal to want to meet the other person and find out if there is compatibility or if you have a connection to start a relationship.

But if you really have an interest in it and are looking for something serious, you may want to avoid wasting time and find out if the thing can really work. Now we know that you can save yourself the questioning and discover if the thing can have a future with just a simple question.

According to marriage counselor Robert Maurer, there is a very fast and effective way to predict whether the relationship will be successful, and he is asking the following question: “How does one Wonderful person like you is still single? " Maurer explains that this question so cliché and that a priori may seem very simple, in fact it can reveal a lot about the other person.

So it doesn't matter if she has a sense of humor, what she does, or if we have things in common. What can really reveal something about the future with that person is the answer to this question. One of the reasons this is the question to ask on your first date is that, on the one hand, the other person will take it as a compliment. On the other hand, your reply will be very revealing.

And what does that answer tell us?

And how do you know? As well, our quote's answer to that question will tell us a lot on how their relationships have worked so far. Anyone can make mistakes on a date or even come off as the perfect match. But knowing how they have managed previous relationships will be a good indicator of how this person can function in her future relationships.

When the other person tells us about their last relationshipWhat does it really tell us? When explaining why she is single, do you tell us that she has chosen badly? Are they taking responsibility for the failure of their last relationship? Maybe that she was not ready to maintain a relationship?

In Maurer's view, if our date tells us a story in which she only appears as the victim, you must flee. If the person does not take any responsibility for the failure of their previous relationships, it can be a symptom of narcissism.

Relationships and their development are usually a thing of two, so it is very likely that both people have had some responsibility when cutting off the relationship. Therefore, if you are one of those people who only blames others because their relationship is not working and does not show the slightest hint of self-criticism, it is a red flag for us to stay away.

The key to a successful relationship

What would be a good answer then? According to Maurer, some research suggests that the key to a successful relationship is the ability to manage and solve the problems that the couple has. Therefore, someone who only holds the other person responsible for the failure in their relationship will hardly try to solve and fix the problem.

The ideal therefore would be that our appointment presented itself as a person capable of analyzing the problems and do self-criticism. Someone who would show interest in conciliation, rather than blaming the other person. This would be an indicator that you are someone who takes responsibility and is willing to put in the effort to make the relationship work.

Therefore, do not forget to ask this question on your first date if you have any interest in formalizing a relationship with that person. This will be the best predictor to know if the other is ready to maintain a new relationship and if it is someone with whom you can prosper as a couple.

• Related article: "The 12 questions you should ask yourself before falling in love with that person"